Wednesday, May 28, 2008

The Power of Primary

A couple of days ago on Sunday we sat down to a meal of barbequed chicken and pasta salad. Little did I know what a treat this would be for princess kryptonite cupcake as her adulation began:

"MMMMMM! oh mom this is so good! This is delicious food! Thank you so much for making me this wonderful dinner. You are such a wonderful mom! (again, this is her actual verbage, I am not embellishing.)

"Well thank you so much Sophie that is so nice of you, daddy grilled the chicken though, it wasn't all me."

"Oh daddy thank you for the chicken it is just wonderful! Thank you for this good food. I love you daddy."

Daddy says, "She seems to be laying it on a little thick."

I say: "You need to reinforce postive behavior, if you haver a child who actually says thank you and is showing appreciation, you need to appreciate and acknowledge it."

So I tell her:"THank you for being so nice Sophie, and saying thank you and being kind. I really like it when you are so nice and say thank you. That is a good girl."

She beams from ear to ear, pleased with herself and feeling good and says:"Yep! And now I'm going to heaven!"

"You are? How do you know that?"

"'cause I said nice things and my primary teacher said if I say nice things and be kind to people I'm going to heaven.And I said nice things to you so now I'm going to heaven!"

I turn to Herman. "What do I do with that? Do I just leave it at that or get into a discussion with her about "Heaven" and goodness and such or just leave it at that?"

"Just leave it at that."

And so I have for now. But I must say, the idea of going to heaven is working as pretty good motivation for her these last few days. She has been congratulating herself on making the cut for heaven for handing me a screwdriver, taking good care of her doll and speaking kindly to it,saying thank you,giving me a hug, and sharing her french fries. But she's actually trying to be good. I don't know what kind of 4 year old conception of heaven is working as this strong of a motivation for her, but it been more effective than most incentives I've been able to come up with. She's only 4 so it's not like she needs things to be all figured out right now. But she wants to be good, maybe I should just leave it at that.......for now.

Monday, May 26, 2008

So Very Wrong in so many ways OR: This makes me twitch OR:Eeeeewww!

Tine for a new icky desktop photo. This one made me cry out: "My eyes!!!" I think I now have burnt retinas and permanent nausea. My Husband will hate this. I am so excited to save it to my desktop. I used to want a Sharpei puppy........I think I'm cured.....

Somewhere bubbling up from the depths of my have I forgotten.....Cougar Stadium...1980 something.....Freedom Festival.....

there he is...the Knight Rider.......The a skin tight electric blue leather suit...with huge shoulder pads....dancing in the whitest of White boy ways...along with clapping to the beat and head movement like chickens pecking for food.......dancing on top of Kitt, the Knight Rider car....and singing.....(who knew he was huge in Germany)....yes, singing.....I can't remember what though......what a coup for Provo Utah..way to go BYU.......'cause nothing says God Bless America better than in image like this one.

Monday, May 19, 2008

Almost forgot...

Lets call it Desktop of the week, not the day. Because one, that is too high of a bar for me, and 2, I dn't want to run out of pictures.

More Vital Ramblings

Wow, that time has gone by fast. I fully intended to blog almost, if not every day. It's been 11. I guess I have just been way too busy being awesome. Some of the fascinating and awesome things I have been up to are:

Taking PKC to have 2 cavities filled, requiring sedation. She did well but in the prcess chomped down on her numb bottom lip causing the nastiest and fattest fat lip I have seen and can't do anything to fix. See Photo, which does not do this justice. It looks like she is pouting but she's not that's just how it looks.

Getting so sick and tired of the fight between the midrise jean, the not quite long enough shirt I have to keep pulling down and my longer than average torso.


Becoming the best there is in the world at retaining water(#$%!*&#%! cankles)

Accompanying my four year old on her Retail Restroom tour of America. What is this about?! During a trip to WalMart we can go twice. I actually miss diapers sometimes. She has to check out the restrooms everywhere we go. I think she saves it up just so she can have an excuse. We actually have debates about whether she really has to go or not. As with many things in my parental anxiety, I wonder if this is something that will require therapy later for her someday because I drank Dr. Pepper when I was pregnant.


Having a good laugh while having lunch with a friend when PKC cries out loudly enough for all around us at our friendly neighborhood Applebee's to hear: "Whoa! I just threw up in my mouth a little bit!"

Having insomnia.


Feeling certain that if I were an adolescent to adult male, I would somehow be able to manage getting all the urine in the bowl. I really believe I could pull this off. It may require a deliberate effort but I know I could. Is this failure to try harder to do this just the biological programming of the male of the species to manifest that they are walking around with these awesome, powerful and uncontrollably fierce anatomical appendages? Something akin to say,gorilla chest beating or Rams butting heads? Try this folks: Ready, Aim , Fire,in that order ONLY!! If you have the manual dexterity required to play all the way through expert level on Gutiar Hero III, or do the simultaneous run jump shoot flip duck run shoot spin shoot necessary on all those other XBOX games, again, I feel that you posess the ability to get the urine IN the bowl.

Wondering how in the crap there is still so much laundry.

Thursday, May 8, 2008

I love this girl....she amazes me

I had another couple of conversations with Princess Kryptonite Cupcake today. She just turned 4 and how her mind works blows me away sometimes. I could be easily impressed because I want to be because she's mine and we all want to think are children are amazing....but I really think she is. This morning she burst into the room and asked me:

PKC: "Mom, when did Heavenly Father and Jesus create The Humans?"

Me: "Uh...what er, when? Uh a long time ago." (?)

PKC: "Oh. Well I don't remember that."

Me: "Hmm, me neither"

PKC: "Well why did they create The Humans?"

Me: "Uhh, Why do you think they created The Humans?"

PKC "So we could have a mom and dad and they would love us."

Me: "Yeah, I think that's one reason why else?"

PKC: "So we could have a family and be kind and gentle." (this is good stuff I think)

Me: "I think you're right. Why else do you think?"

PKC: "And so we can have friends and be happy"

Me: "THat's right! and why else?"

PKC: "So uh we could have dressing tables." (She loves her Little Mermaid dressing table see...)

Me: "Huh...."

PKC: "...and so we could do what Heavenly Father wants us to do."

Me: "You're right, and what does He want us to do?"

PKC: "umm Keep our room clean for two weeks."

Me: not sure what to say to this, I love this kid, I laugh "I love you Sophie"

PKC: "I love you too mom sooo much"

later today

she walks in the room where I am working and announces:

"Mom, if it wasn't for you and me, I'd still be in Heaven.

I think I want to watch some kid cartoons."

Thanks Princess for making me smile more than anything else ever has.

Here's something that should make you smile. Especially if you are familiar with the original song, "Time to Say Goodbye" Try Youtube if you don't. Like I said, I love me some Muppets as well as some Andrea Bocelli or Josh Groban. Half of the reason I like it is because it sound a lot like the bedtime negotiations at our house. Only without the singing. Please enjoy....

Monday, May 5, 2008

New Desktop of the Day

It's time for me to switch the desktop to something else to make me laugh when my husband hates looking at it. Here is Elwood, the reigning World's ugliest dog. Sam's succesor.

Saturday, May 3, 2008

For Real

So, I am looking online for some funny pictures someone sent me of a redneck wedding so I could post them on here. Of course, I Google "Redneck Wedding photos". I found them, but first I found the following post on Yahoo It is for real. I am hoping the humor I find in this is obvious without requiring too much commentary from me. It begins with a post from someone who is looking for "Cute Redneck Wedding Ideas" ON PURPOSE. Apparently because after several marriages each the bride and groom have become disillusioned enough with marriage to kick off another one by making a mockery of it. Again this is a real post please take note of the "winning" response from a kindred soul who felt that if you're going to have a weddin', why not make it a redneck extravaganza. By the way, at the end of the pasted in post, I will post the actual link in case you want to see it for real.

Resolved Question

Does anyone have any cute redneck wedding ideas?

"My fiance and I want to do a redneck themed wedding. I've been looking online for some ideas, but all that keeps coming up is redneck jokes. Hee hee. Thanks for any help we can get! We've both already had the traditional weddings. We now are just going to have fun with ours. I love the tractor idea and all the others. Keep them coming! Thanks so much for all the help! See I think it'll be fun. I'm not a redneck at all. But he comes from a family that is. So I think it's going to be a blast. Thanks for all the help! Keep it coming! Ha I love the idea of us standing in the back of a truck. How cute would that be! How about invites? Any redneck ideas? I'm thinking something that goes with duct tape. lol"

by victoria E.
Member since: September 03, 2006
Total points:
2501 (Level 4)

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker
"I hope this helps you out. My husband and I had a hillbilly themed wedding. We drank from mason jars, had a BBQ, he even wore bibs and a Kesslars t shirt. Had a hill billy band complete with brown jug. OUr card box was in the shape of a log cabin and we served pies instead of cake. My husband and Mom even danced to red neck woman. I made our invitations that had a picture of a drunk hillbilly being carried by his wife (he was holding a brown jug) and underneath it said "I sure hope pa don't wake up soon" Instead of a guest book, we put down a piece of white fabric and had everyone sign it and give us any well wishes. I am making that into a quilt. I originally wanted to have a traditional wedding but found out I was pregnant, so I decided to let my husband and mom plan the wedding, I told them anything as long as it was fun."
• 1 year ago

my own wedding.

Asker's Rating: ****

Asker's Comment:
"That's Awesome thanks for the help!!!!"

The Link:

And where it all began, the awesome photos I was looking for to begin with:

Thursday, May 1, 2008

Twisted Desktop of the Day

So I have decided lately that a funny (if only to me)thing to do would be to find a funny or perhaps slightly creepy picture to save as the desktop for the pure sake of amusing/annoying my husband depending on what kind of mood I happen to be in. I think I will post them on here, at least every once in a while. I laugh at how much he hates this picture every time he has to look at it. This is a real picture (except the photoshopped wings)of a real dog named Sam that until he died held the title of worlds ugliest dog. Now there is a new titleholder which I may have to post another time. There's just a glimpse for you into the snakepit of my mind. This picture makes me feel like I need to brush my teeth.


Cinderella dress $20
Cheap plastic lei. $.50
Plastic toy harmonica shaped like an ear of corn that came from that big bag o' toys from cousin Hannah $0
Disney princess slippers $9.95
Black tights to give it that Minnie Mouse feel $ 3.00
Pocket Simon game keychain from DI that goes with you everywhere $.50
Do it yourself with school scissors haircut $0

The confidence necessary to work this kind of a look and leave us wanting more....priceless.

My wonder child

One of the main reasons I decided to blog is to chronicle the nonstop adventure of being Princess Kryptonite Cupcake's (Sophie's) mom. She has no doubt that the world is her oyster and proceeds to become best friends with everyone she meets. I believe by watching people's reactions to her that this ability may go beyond mere charm and somehow involve magical powers. I will post here some of the best conversations I have had with her in the last couple of weeks:

"Mom if our house was high high up off the ground, how would we get in?"
"Uhhh, maybe some really high stairs?"
"Ummm.. yeah I guess that’d work but, I think it would be better to have someone pull us up in a basket tied to a rope."
"Uh, yeah I guess that would work too."

"Mom does Jesus have a car?"
"Um no I don’t think so. I don’t think he needs a car."
"Well how does he get places?"
"Ummm, like where?" (hoping this clarification will make it simpler to answer the question.)
"Well,how does he get to Salt Lake and go to the temple."
"Ummmmmmmmm Uh he can just make his body be there when he wants to."
"But how?" (yeesh, you're 4 cut me some slack)
"Uhhhh I don’t know, maybe he just thinks about being there and then he is there."
"Huh! (impressed) OK,Why does the sun come up in the morning?"
"These questions are going to get harder aren’t they?"
"Yeah"(matter of factly)

"Mommy when I grow up will I live with you and daddy?"
"No, you’ll live with your husband and kids."
"Ummmm…OK but I want you to be my neighbor."
"OK it’s a deal. I’d like that."
"But can we both move somewhere else away from here? I really don’t want to live in this house forever."
"Nether do I Soph. neither do I."

"Mommy, I thought I might want a mom who doesn’t get mad at me all the time.Buuuut, no, I just still want you."
"Good, I’m glad Sophie I want you too. Do I get mad at you too much?"
"Yeah, but I need to be good too."
"OK I love you Sophie."
"I love you too mommy."

"Mommy how does Heavenly Father get down from heaven?"
"Ummmm to where?…"(stalling for time)
"To Tooele."(tone indicating..duh)
"Uhhhh." (still thinking about layer upon layer of things…..)
"Well I think he goes... (Stands up on couch, reaching as high as she can and picture using hand like an airplane going really fast toward the ground, while jumping off couch)
Schshooooooow! (imagine a sound indicating great velocity)
"Hmmm maybe, Sophie." (That’s way better than anything I would have come up with )

And lest I forget, yesterday I made Jiffy Raspberry muffins for her for breakfast 'cause I'm so awesome.
I tell her how yummy they are going to be.

"Mommy when are they going to be done?"

"in just a minute Sophie"

we sit down to enjoy, we bite in....I say
"mmmm, these are good (they are) do you like them?

Sophie bites and says........
"Mmmmmmmm "(with great gusto which makes me have a teensy mommy smile and then she says...)
"Tastes like chicken!"

WTH?! Raspberry muffins....No I'm not kidding.....